God knoweth what things ye have need of even before you ask

In my patriarchal blessing, it told me to memorize 2 chapters of scripture. A few years ago I finally memorized the first one, and amazing things happened as a result. About a month ago, I kept getting the feeling that I should memorize the second chapter: Hebrews 11. And so it began. For a few weeks, I used the time set aside for scripture study to memorize the chapter. It is an interesting chapter. It is a chapter about faith. For the first little while, I memorized verses about Moses, Abraham, Enoch, etc. Mighty, prominent men in the scriptures who worked miracles and great events through their faith. And then one day, I came to a verse near the end. The first half of the verse continued the theme of miracles being performed through faith, but halfway through, it took a drastic turn. It started talking about people who were tortured, stoned, sawn asunder, etc. It spoke of all these people who were severely afflicted, and yet stayed true to their faith in God. Each day as I read or spoke that verse aloud, it brought tears to my eyes, maybe it was the juxtoposition with the other men and women spoken of earlier in the chapter. Needless to say, I thought about it alot. I wondered why these verses of sorrow and trial were connected so closely to the other examples. I came to the conclusion that these people, "of whom the world was not worthy' were pillars and examples of faith just as powerfully as Moses, Abraham, Enoch, and all the others were. Here were people who had sore trials and sorrows heaped upon them, who by any of the world's standards, should "curse God and die." And yet they remained faithful. They did not let their tribulations rob them of their trust in God. As I studied and memorized this chapter, it was a powerful experience.

A few weeks after I finished memorizing it, I found out something that broke my heart. A good friend of mine from my high school days has been experiencing what seems to be an endless supply of tribulation. Three years ago, her son was born with a heart defect that required an almost immediate transplant. But even after that, he has continued to spend most of his life in the hospital with strange illnesses and life-threatening diseases that leave doctors puzzled. She keeps a blog so that family and friends can be easily informed of the latest happenings with her son....whether they are still in the hospital, or if they've gone home until the next time (which is never too far away). Her husband is in medical school and they live far away from family.

She was 7 months pregnant, and she wrote a post that broke everyone's heart. She found out she has thyroid cancer. Here is a modern day example of someone the world would look at and say, "Curse God and die." Because of her son's transplant, there are people all over the world that are aware of her and everything that she's going through. Several of them made comments to the extent that they can't believe this is happening. Hasn't she been through enough already. So off she went, getting surgery, crossing her fingers her son wouldn't require hospitilization while she recovered, wondering what the outcome will be of all the testing, hoping both her baby and herself will survive the surgery, wondering how much the cancer can grow in the two months before she can get treatment.....You can see how people would look at her and think, "Enough already! Give the poor girl a break."

My heart broke for her. This was the girl who was always quick to smile, my running partner and therefore confidant of all things cruch-related. Never did either of us imagine that this was what awaited her. As I thought of her and prayed for her, my thoughts kept returning to the scriptures I had just memorized. Because of all the experiences with her son, there were people all over the country who knew of her, who followed her life through her blog, and who know waited anxiously to see the outcome of this new development. And she did not stumble. She held on to her faith. She stood as a witness that no matter what, she would trust in the Lord. No matter what.

As I pondered about her circumstances and these scriptures, I kept feeling a desire to send her a message. And so I did. She responded. She talked about how my message and thoughts were something that she needed to hear, and said that they had helped her. I knew that I had been an instrument of the Lord in giving her a message of love. I was in awe of how the Lord had prepared me so that I could do it. Weeks before either of us knew this was coming, He prompted me to study and memorize these scriptures I'd put off for years. I didn't know that He'd need me to use it to bless her life. But I'm so glad I followed that prompting. I'm so glad that the Lord was aware, that he knew in advance, exactly how to succor this sweet daughter of his as she struggled under tribulations that many thought would be too much to bear.

Answering My Own Prayers

I have someone in my life that I love, someone who has struggled for several years, someone who is unable to fulfill their dreams because of choices they've made, someone who might have given up hope on themselves, someone whose life is more often filled with sorrow than joy. About a year ago, something happened that left me bawling all night. I've shed many tears for this person over the years because of everything they've been through, but this night was different. My heart ached so badly for them, for all that they were missing in life, all that they'd suffered, all that they had given up. I made a commitment that night. I knew that God was the only one with the ability to work a miracle in this person's life, and I resolved that I would petition Him and pull down His power in this person's behalf in any means available to me. I have been praying and fasting on a daily and weekly basis. I try to be specific in my pleadings rather than simply asking God to bless them. A few weeks ago, I started asking God to surround this person with people of good influence who would pull them back to God. This was the thing that I felt would be most powerful at this point in the person's life. I didn't think much of it when a certain idea kept coming to my mind. This specific idea had filtered through a few times before, but I had never committed to it, maybe out of fear or maybe out of doubt. But this time, I made a decision that I was going to act on this impression that kept pressing upon me. It would take a lot of preparation, it would involve a form of directness that had always resulted in bad results previously, and I was more than a little scared to carry it out, but I was committed. I felt really good after making the decision and knew that it was something God wanted me to do. A few days later as I was reiterating my plea that people of good influence would come into this person's life and pull them back to God, my heart froze with a spiritual realization. It was me. I was the person I had been praying for.